– the visit

a poem from

walking towards happiness

the lady in black 
always came knocking at my door
since the beginning she appeared 
looking for my soul
 since my childhood 
 she tried to take me 
 and i said no
 but today 
 she finally convinced me 
 to let go
 so many things happened 
 since i was born
 so many moments 
 that gave me pain 
 and denied me love
 i carry in my heart 
 the transgressions 
 that left me undone 
 and i never forgot her poisonous 
 cold kisses and her sweet voice 
 i escaped her prison a few times 
 as she cornered me 
 from dusk to dawn
 i beat her in so many marathons 
 as i ran faster but still 
 i bit the dust
 she tried to always trap me 
 and she never could pay the cost
 always insisting 
 and today i will not fight 
 so she can take me home 
 i feel no envy 
 for what i had to endure 
 all along
 i only feel 
 an immense emptiness 
 inside my soul
 i can only say 
 that my will was always mine 
 and mine alone
 i can smile and feel happy 
 because i no longer have to run
 the visit of this lady 
 only assures me 
 that it is time to go
 she is coming dry and cold 
 in painful tears 
 without absolution
 the visit of death 
 has not been the best 
 nor will it be the worst
 but with me 
 i am taking a smile 
 full of betrayal and confusion   
 i am taking with me 
 the mistakes made
 wrapped in pain
 one of many that threw me 
 without compassion 
 to the floor
 i am taking 
 the clandestine sins 
 full of heartache
 one of many that forced me 
 to lose my logic and reasoning
 it forced me to 
 no longer fight fearless 
 as i always did before 

#POETRYPOEMBOOKOFPOETRYPOETRYBOOKPOEMSPOETSPOET #sadpoetry #authorpoemsporngaywritergaypoetry #gaypoet #poetrylovers #gaywriter #gaybloggergayartistgaylover #writers #authors #poets

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